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International Dating App Advice: How can I get that hot girl?

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We’ve answered a question regarding how to get a hot girl who has set the bar too high for a romantic guy. They met each other on an international dating app. Now this guy is wondering how to get that extremely hot girl. (In order to protect their privacy, specific details have been changed in this article and their real names are not revealed. Also, to further protect their privacy, the original query isn’t disclosed here, so you will simply read our response and learn the wisdom.)

Dear Darren,

This hot girl’s interactions with you throughout this process was also very difficult for her: On one hand, she is very interested in you; on the other hand, she is not sure whether you like her enough or not & she doesn’t have the dating skills to get you.  If her skills were outstanding, she would make you feel that it was your idea to get her.  In a way, it is harder for women to get men because traditionally, a woman is not supposed to be the leader in a relationship.  In contrast, because men are supposed to do the chase, it’s okay for men to be proactive and pursue whomever you want, as long as you have the skills and courage to do fast app

The fact that on the international dating app, she asked you about your previous relationships means she really likes you.  Otherwise, why would she move the conversation to that direction?  She could have talked about anything else.  She asked you about your previous relationships, partly because she wanted to assess what kind of man you are, and partly because she wanted to begin talking about dating and relationships with you (she considers you a potential boyfriend).  She has given you many green lights.

When she began to ask you about your previous relationships, that was exactly when you should ask her about her past.  Because you didn’t ask her about her past, she assumed that you aren’t very interested in her – she thought if a guy likes her, he should care enough to ask about her past, especially when she has already asked about his app date

She had a boyfriend for a long time and then she has been single for a few years means she is girlfriend/wife material.  Look at most girls in their 20s in western countries – usually they slept with this guy last night and then sleep with that guy tonight.  Not many young women are girlfriend/wife material these days.

Every woman has an ideal man in her head, and almost all women want someone they don’t deserve. 

  • That’s why “the dream guy” is oftentimes a dream only.

You really need to ask her about her previous relationship while chatting with her on the international dating app.  I have a feeling that her previous relationship might have hurt her a lot.  It looks a bit like a trauma which could possibly result in trust issues and/or negative associations with men.  (Maybe she was upset for a few years and nearly lost hope in men…until she met you online.)  If she doesn’t say anything negative about her ex-boyfriend, that’s better because that means she is a mature woman who can learn from her experiences.  But if she blames her ex-boyfriend a lot and complains about her ex in front of you, that’s a red flag (no matter whose fault it was in her previous relationship) because if she is still bitter and angry after a few years, that only means her next relationship probably won’t go well either.real women on app

I knew she is the pretty, elegant, intelligent and polite girl without discharging s*x from her body based on her messages with you.  The way she talks on the international dating app is way more mature than most girls of her age.  She is not a selfish girl.

Yes, in life, you either wait or create.

  • In relationships, as a man, you either lead or be misled.

Speaking of picking up girls on university campuses, you can do some research online and figure out which restaurants/cafes inside and outside university campuses are where students frequent.  It’s easier to do day game at university because female students expect to meet men at university.  You can say you come to this university to use its library or to look for a book from its campus bookstore.  You can also look around the campus and find out if there are any flyers about students’ activities/events/cocktail parties/masquerade parties.  And you should be there too, as long as they accept people outside their university to join (it’s totally possible, because many men have done that again and again as nowadays tickets are purchased online.)  If they ask you why you are attending their cocktail party, you can say something like ‘I really like your club/society’ or ‘I happened to be near here today, so I just wanted to see what’s happening here tonight’.  Most of the time, they are just happy that you are there because that means they have sold one more ticket.  And they usually care less when it comes to why you are there, since most people have 1,001 things in their head about themselves – they are not going to analyse/over think why you are there.  Oftentimes, a girl that you are talking to at a party is actually thinking about what you are thinking of her!  When you attend their parties, make sure you dress well and be the high-value and sophisticated guy.  Chances are boys who are still studying at university can’t compete with men in their 30s because younger boys aren’t experienced and don’t have enough resources – they have lower value than more mature men.  However, younger women in their early 20s are at their prime time.  Smart younger women would prefer someone a bit older than them because most of their male classmates at university don’t really match their for apps

Glad to know that you consider asking for dating advice as an investment because that means you have a growth mindset.  By contrast, most men with a fixed mindset only think if they buy expensive watches and fancy cars, those things will get them high-quality girls.  Unfortunately, without attractive behaviour, most men can only go so far in life, no matter they join international dating apps or dating apps

If you are already a handsome man, it’s much easier for you to demonstrate attractive behaviour.  I used to run human dynamics workshops with four men who are around 5’’7’, and they are incredibly good at getting girls.  One of them told me that he picked up a hot model who didn’t want to stand up because she was worried that she was too tall for him.  In the end, she removed her high heels to leave the venue with him.

This girl doesn’t religiously like other men’s Instagram/Facebook photos.  The fact that she only likes your Instagram/Facebook photos religiously means she wants you to contact her!  She is thinking about you all the time after meeting you on the international dating app.

Although most women have “an ideal man” in their mind, when love really comes, it truly doesn’t matter anymore.  Have you experienced situations similar to this? – You thought you were looking for a woman who has XYZ, but then someone with different qualities rocked up & you found her so attractive; therefore, all those XYZ went out of the window!

All the best!


Dating Consultant at

The ugly truth is: If you have more money and good looks, you need less attractive behaviour.  If you have less money and don’t have good looks, you need more attractive behaviour.  And that’s exactly why men like Bill Clinton and Leonardo DiCaprio could basically get most women in the world – they have (or had) good looks/sexiness, money/power, and lots of attractive behaviour at the same time.

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